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Shiny Progress Magic. A formula to change your life.

  • skylermoondream
  • May 6, 2016
  • 6 min read

Hey there wonderful human! After a few days of freaking out about not having a career, money, or direction in life, I decided, that none of that is actually true, and that my brain was chilling on the pessimistic side of my libra, out of fear.

So here to clarify to myself and other 20 somethings, or anyone else reading today..

Not having a career. What does that mean? If we look backwards, I am pretty sure everything we have gotten involved in has taught us something. Either about what we do like, or what we don't, and consequently, we have chosen to include or exclude similar adventures to our "path" or career in the making.

One day, we will look back and see exactly how each piece needed to fit into the puzzle of crafting our own, tailored to fit like a hug from the universe life path.

If you are one of our fellow, super perfectionist, or hard on yourself version of a millennial humanoid 2.0 however, you might feel that if a few months go by without any mayor progress, we are wasting our life, and I relate, so so much. But as all of these socio psycho self guided books claim, our frontal lobes cannot really see or plan for the future at all and that is "a human condition" Basically, those who plan and save for the years ahead, have a better way of convincing themselves that the future exists.

This is helpful, and sometimes easier, but it does not mean, that some of us who do not function this way are wrong, or on the wrong track for that matter.

For the rest of us, the adventurers, the wonderers, the risk takers, we need to value ourselves for being all over the damn spectrum of creativity and freedom. We inspire, we start fired up discussions and even judgements by questioning the traditional tactics, and this is just as necessary, as the first thing. Between the 5 and 10 year planners, and the 5 and 10 minute impulsive leapers, we all get to learn from one another and combust into brilliance.

But shiny progress magic sometimes appears as silly distractions, before seen as full moon miracles.

I have been feeling things, about being back home... and yes I mean at my parental home, well one of them in Boston. Whenever I come back here after "failing" at the latest plan that was supposed to launch me into a few years of stability, I kind of feel useless. But then I remember right away, that failing is more like falling, and then we just get back up. I remember that feeling buried so far deep underground is exactly what we need, as the seeds that we are, to find that new source of motivation to reach for the light.

I recently told a friend something along these lines, coming from living through a similar situation, and expressed she must let her friends and family "water her" and she should water herself by crying or dancing or screaming or whatever gives us that little "haaaaaa" to continue reaching for the sun. These few months, or weeks, and sometimes years, that feel stagnant, are very useful for developing the multifaceted aspects of our personas. Perhaps the "job" we want, is impossible to reach before we learn the life skills, emotion balancing for example, that requires keeping that path once we find it.

The crucial part here is the realization factor. If we are unhappy with our current situation, we continue to look for new ones, and if we are not exploring, attempting, or even searching, then we must not really care enough to change it in the first place. We have to be brutally honest, I mean many times I have complained about being unemployed, or broke, yet deep down knowing I was too comfortable or scared to actually modify my life, and so I stayed put, until I really got fed up with my day to day, and actively wanted to change it.

There are waves and stages to everything. Sometimes realizing you want change, does not mean you are ready to flip just yet. Becoming aware of something seems to kind of just happen, but actually doing something about it, requires making a decision. Each day that we wake up and do nothing differently, we are agreeing, to continue living the way we are. Doing nothing about it in a sense, its doing a lot, to perpetuate our current situation.

But let me put it in simple words, the words that changed everything for me lately.

NOTHING IS PERMANENT.

Not a new concept right?

No matter how long a period of unproductiveness feels, it will always make some sense in retrospect. Even the past year I have spent doing "nothing" rehabbing from physical injuries and stapling my soul back together, I have learned an innumerable amount of newness to add to my life skills. From building a wooden dresser, to holistic medicinal plan healing, to really identifying my emotions, and most importantly, learning that we are allowed to shed the many personalities we accumulate and develop in life, which no longer serve us. We do not need to stick to "I am outgoing" or "I am a tomboy" we should allow ourselves more fluidity, since we are ever-expanding beings of consciousness.

Neuroplasticity. Our brains can be re trained, to think and act, and feel differently, about ourselves and the world.

So back to this non-permanence thing... I find myself stressing over "this is my life now" and "how am I ever going to be successful at A, if I can never find time or money or whatever else for B"

The truth is that if we truly desire change, we can create a shift in our lives, no matter how small, it will affect everything else. If we decide to pick up a new hobby, we end up with a new network of people, new conversations, new ideas, new opportunities.

We do not have to only narrow our actions down to one area to improve our entire life. If we are exhausted of job searching (me last week) we can switch to changing something else about our life, and see how that ripples out into all the other areas that seek progress if we let it.

On my last LinkedIn surfing adventure, I decided to "procrastinate" and message a person who teaches meditation whose profile caught my eye. I asked if we could connect via phone, and if they would be open to sharing their current career and life path with me. This person turned out to be a huge catalyst for me re-starting my dormant meditation habits. We had a wonderful conversation, we meditated via phone for 20 minutes, and I have been keeping up this practice twice a day since. I knew I needed to get back into it, for months, but for some reason, nothing I tried motivated me enough to do so. Connecting with this wonderful human changed everything.

I sit at home, typing this, and I think I am so thankful for having this place to come back to, and yet a few days ago I sat in the same place thinking my life sucked for still not being set on my independence roadmap. The difference was this non-permanence idea. No matter how long this time period feels, the truth is I will not live here for ever, because I already know I do not want to, and so I continue to explore my options, and most importantly, I continue to act on those explorations.

I have found a way to breathe deeper and fuller lately, and I think its due to this new trust I am developing in myself. I always felt bothered by the whole "trust the universe" concept, even though, I think people who do, move along into their missions faster, but I am enjoying this idea of trusting that I am committed to living differently, and that is what will save me, and what IS saving me.

This fear of "things will never change, and how will I ever" were more of my own reflections, of not believing I had the strength to continue searching for what I wanted.

I believe,

that as long as I trust,

that I will not give up trying,

I will find my way, to make it all happen.

I know wording in this structure is confusing, but that is how it makes the most sense as a step by step.

We need to believe, that we have the strength to want the life we imagine,

and we need to continue trying new ways of accomplishing this constantly, until one day we wake up in the middle of it! and looking backwards, every little, or long time of nonsense, has made perfect sense.

 
 
 

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